Biblical love declares, “Love is not self-seeking” (1 Cor. 13:5, NIV). The ESV states it this way, “love does not insist on its own way.” Being born again based on the cross of Jesus with His blood freely flowing for our salvation, our DNA as Christ-followers is agape, sacrificial love.
Do we in the Christian community exemplify agape sacrificial love? Are we like others in this world insisting on our own way? Do we consistently position ourselves and our agendas as more important than the needs of others? Are we demanders or facilitators?
Jesus sets the example of unselfishness in John 13:2-5, “2 The evening meal was in progress…3 Jesus knew that the Father had put all things under his power, and that he had come from God and was returning to God; 4 so he got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. 5 After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples’ feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him.” Jesus knew God the Father had placed all power under Him. What did He do? Did He arrogantly demand others allegiance and the control of their life? No, He humbly served them.
Philippians 2 declares for us to exemplify the mindset of Jesus, “3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” Humbly and genuinely look after the interest of others along with your own. You will see something beautiful occur. Close, in-depth, mature friendships will happen allowing you to experience the koinonia fellowship in the “awesomeness” of Jesus at the core.
How about our speech as believers? Do we reflect selfishness with our demands at the forefront or support for others? Ephesians 4:29 is such a constructive verse, “Let no unwholesome word come out of your mouth, but if there is any good word for edification according to the need of the moment, say that, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” As His people our speech is to be wholesome, edifying, and graceful to others.
Are you a self-seeker who insists on your own way? Surrender this to Him and allow Him to show His love and encouragement to others through you. Learn to facilitate rather than demand.