I don’t mind telling you, as a man, I enjoy the color of flowers. I grew up with a very athletic, physically strong dad who loved planting beautiful full-of-color plants and flowers every year. One of the colorful flowers was a pansy. This flimsy looking little flower appears anything but durable, yet it is one of the very few flowers that can usually withstand the harsh, cold elements of winter. As a kid, if one of my buddies did not appear to behave in a macho, strong manner, he was called a “pansy”. After many years of life, I recognize that appearances often fool you. “A pansy is usually not a pansy.”
When we see a very, muscular physically powerful looking man, we often say, “There goes a man.” If he is unusually strong and forceful and performs well on an athletic field, we call these guys “a man’s man.” Often, once you get to know these guys off the field of competition, you discover that appearances are deceiving. Beyond the physical, they are not solid, strong people at all but are egotistical, self-serving, and immature.
Paul the Apostle understood this clearly. In 1Timothy 3:2-7, as he describes what a good leader looks like, you will notice that he gages a man not by appearance but by character:
- “Now the overseer is to be above reproach”. He lives a solid life, a man of character, that others can see as life is lived out.
- “Faithful to his wife”, he is a man who cherishes one relationship above all others, his wife.
- “Temperate”, self-restrained doing things in moderation never out of control.
- “Respectable”, humble, courteous, considerate, and thoughtful.
- “Hospitable”, friendly and welcoming to strangers or guests.
- “Able to teach”, having the depth to be able to instruct others accurately from the Word of God.
- “Not given to drunkenness,” controlled by the Holy Spirit not out of control, never an embarrassment to the Lord and His people.
- “Not violent but gentle”
- “Not quarrelsome”
- “Not a lover of money”
- “Manages his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect.”
- ”Must be mature in his faith and walk, seasoned in his faith.”
- “Must also have a good reputation with outsiders.”
The above is how the Bible describes “God’s man” not a “man’s man”. A man of God focuses his life on character not appearance.
Ladies, it is the same for you. Scripture clearly reveals that women should not get caught up in the world of appearance but Godliness and character.