One of the most amazing Biblical verses is found in Ephesians 4:30 Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Why so amazing?
In John 14:23, the Holy Spirit is referred to as “the Helper.” The Greek word that is translated here is Paracletos which can be translated “one called alongside to help; or Comforter, Advocate, Intercessor.” Romans 8:26-27 states, In the same way, the Spirit also helps our weakness (comforts); for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words; and He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He intercedes for the saints according to the will of God (advocate). Notice the intimacy between the Holy Spirit and each of us who are Christ followers. He lives in us to continuously help, comfort, intercede and working with Christ acting as an advocate. Wow!
According to Ephesians 4:30, we have the ability to grieve the Holy Spirit. He is so vested in us that we can hurt Him. How do we do this?
Let’s look at the context of verse 30. In verse 29, Paul talks about the depth of our value towards one another is reflected by how we talk. Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. The manner we choose to talk to each other is of such importance to God that we discover in verse 30, it impacts the Holy Spirit.
Notice the verses behind verse 30. These verses culminate in verse 32 with God’s desire for us to forgive each other. By the way, the forgiveness discussed here is not forgiveness towards folks who deserve it but also those who do not. In fact, the root word used to forgive is the word, grace. So, it becomes apparent that God wants us to forgive one another. Our ability to forgive impacts the Holy Spirit.
So, “grieving the Holy Spirit” has to do with how we talk and forgive each other. Let’s start with our spouse. Grade yourself 1 to 5 with 1 being terrible or very hurtful and 5 being excellent showing value. Give yourself a score how you talk to her. Using the same metric, how well do you forgive her? Then, move to your kids and finally to others (i.e. your family, friends, and work relationships). This is a very important exercise. Why? The Holy Spirit is emotionally involved with your score. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit!