Know Their Pain

Week 3:

The first two weeks of this reading plan reminded you to get to know the names and passions of the men you’re discipling. Today, we’re demonstrating the value of going beyond small talk and addressing felt needs.

See if these excerpts from How to Disciple Men: Short and Sweet speak truth to you:

“Society honors and elevates single moms and their heroic struggles. Doesn’t it make sense to do to the same for hardworking and virtuous single dads? When we see single fathers as a valued asset and champion for their children, we catch a glimpse of how life’s most difficult circumstances can become the greatest of testimonies.” — Matt Havland

“In addiction crisis ministry, listening is probably the most valuable skill you can possess. Men feel ashamed, so they cover their sin. Some critical details that need to come to the surface may be too painful or embarrassing to recall. A skilled listener will hear what’s missing and ask important questions. The answers, pleasant or not, give a perspective that helps the man—and you—maneuver through the first critical hours of confronting crisis.” — Daniel Wobschall

“One of the most challenging prerequisites for discipling men who are ethnically diverse is the willingness to accept their differences without being judgmental or critical. Think about how boring the world would be if all men were alike! A heightened level of respect and admiration for one another comes from recognizing and finding worth in every member, not based on prejudices or preconceived notions, but on acknowledging the value of including men with a wide variety of backgrounds and cultures.” — Elmo Winters

“Connect with young men through story. The millennial mind responds to authentic stories of struggle and victory in a particularly deep way. When a young man understands that you have also struggled, you wash away his fear and prepare his heart for what you have to say.” — David Gregg

Every man faces some level of pain, regret, or anger. Without giving easy answers, we can help men see the truth of Romans 8:19, “Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later.”

True disciples carry each other’s pain.

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